Why do you need a day to make her your Valentine?
- cadreofmen
- Feb 14
- 2 min read
Valentine’s Day is celebrated as the ultimate expression of love, but what if the secret to a thriving relationship wasn’t about a single day of grand gestures? What if, instead of a once-a-year performance, love was something you showed every single day in small, meaningful ways?
Dustin, a member of Cadre of Men, often shares his best practice, which he calls "Time with the King" where they take a 3 mile walk daily. This simple yet powerful habit transformed his marriage. It gave his wife space to be heard, to walk with him, feeling the fresh air on her face while releasing all that was on her mind. And what did he do? He just listened. No distractions, no problem-solving, no phone in his hand. Just the two of them, the wind, the smells of nature, and the sound of their footsteps together.
For me, my personal marital hack is relentless affection. I make sure my wife knows, without a doubt, how much I love and desire her. I make sure she catches me checking her out. I kiss her with passion, even in the simplest of moments. We greet each other at the door, we playfully smack each other on the ass, we hold hands in public, I compliment her in front of others. She doesn’t go more than a few hours without me building her up.
We are like honeymooners—and I will never let that fade.
So I ask you, what if every day was Valentine's Day in your home? What if the scrambled eggs she has every morning were served with elevated love and passion? What if you held her face and paused in your kiss before walking out the door? What if you teased her with a whisper, letting her know she’s in trouble when the kids go to bed?
In my home, my wife is always my valentine. I am far from perfect, but my focus is always on building her up rather than tearing her down.
So here’s your homework: Try one new thing for the next month. Something simple. Maybe it’s holding hands in public every day for a month. Make sure everyone knows—that’s your woman.
Forget the roses. Be present. Connect Everyday.
-Mathew Winder
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